By: Life After Debt
Debt has long been treated as a personal failing — a moral misstep, a sign of irresponsibility, or a lack of discipline. But that narrative is not only outdated, it’s dangerous. According to Amber Duncan, founder of Life After Debt, silence around debt is doing more harm than the debt itself. And she would know. After filing for bankruptcy herself during the 2008 financial crash, Duncan rebuilt not only her financial life but also dedicated her career to helping others do the same, judgment-free.
Through Life After Debt’s signature Clarity Calls, Duncan has heard thousands of stories from people of all walks of life, from teachers, nurses, business owners, to parents, who are all carrying a heavy secret: debt. But what’s most striking isn’t the numbers. It’s the shame.
“Most people don’t actually realize how common their situation is,” Duncan explains. “They assume they’re the only ones who got behind, or that there’s something broken about them. And that’s just not true.”
The Cost of Silence
Shame has a way of making us feel small. It tells us to hide, to isolate, to keep quiet — especially when it comes to money. While personal finance blogs may preach spreadsheets and side hustles, they rarely address the emotional paralysis that comes from simply feeling like a failure. Many individuals would rather endure years of financial stress than ask for help, all because of the false belief that struggling with money is a reflection of who they are.
But silence around debt doesn’t protect people; it traps them. When individuals don’t talk about their financial stress, they lose the opportunity to learn, connect, and access the tools that could help them move forward. Instead, they often spiral deeper, making short-term decisions that carry long-term consequences, like taking out high-interest loans, avoiding bills altogether, or withdrawing emotionally from the people they love most.
Life After Debt challenges that cycle by creating a space where financial conversations are met with compassion instead of criticism. During a Clarity Call, clients are encouraged not to explain away their circumstances or prove their worthiness for help. Instead, they’re asked one simple thing: to be honest.
“We flip the dynamic,” Duncan says. “It’s not about selling someone on a solution. It’s about giving them the dignity to say, ‘This is where I am. What can I do next?’”
Debt Isn’t the Problem — Secrecy Is
Despite what mainstream narratives might suggest, debt itself isn’t inherently destructive. What creates lasting damage is the silence that surrounds it. Couples who hide debt from each other aren’t undone by the balance on the statement; they’re broken by the secrecy. Parents who avoid talking about money with their children don’t shield them from stress; they deny them the financial education they’ll need in adulthood.
And most of all, individuals who keep their struggles private often end up bearing an emotional burden they were never meant to carry alone.
The truth is, debt is astonishingly common. A report from the Federal Reserve found that over 60% of American adults carry some form of credit card debt from month to month (Federal Reserve Bank of New York, 2025). Medical bills remain one of the leading causes of bankruptcy. And yet, despite the sheer volume of people affected, the cultural narrative continues to paint debt as something shameful — a secret to be hidden instead of a reality to be dealt with.
But when debt is destigmatized, when it becomes part of the conversation rather than a source of isolation, everything shifts. People ask for help. They learn about their rights. They explore options they didn’t know existed. They realize they’re not alone.
What Happens When We Talk About It
Amber Duncan has seen it happen time and time again: the moment someone breaks their silence is the moment things begin to change. During one recent call, a woman admitted to hiding a large amount of credit card debt from her spouse and was terrified of what might happen if he found out. But when she finally told the truth, first to Duncan, then to her husband, the outcome wasn’t what she feared.
“He didn’t leave,” she said. “He hugged me.”
It wasn’t the balance that had damaged the relationship, it was the secret. And once it was out in the open, they were able to face it together. With a plan. With hope.
That moment, Duncan says, is what fuels her work. Not just helping people settle debts, but watching them reclaim their voice and their dignity. “
We’ve been conditioned to think that asking for help means we’ve failed. But asking for help is the beginning of freedom.”
Changing the Narrative
The path to financial freedom doesn’t begin with a payment, it begins with permission. Permission to be honest. Permission to stop pretending. Permission to tell the truth about where you are without fear of being judged for how you got there.
And that’s what makes Life After Debt different. It doesn’t promise perfection. It doesn’t shame people into better habits. It offers something much rarer: a place to begin again, with grace.
In a world where curated success stories dominate social feeds and self-worth is often linked to credit scores, choosing to talk openly about debt is a radical act. It challenges the illusion that everyone else has it all together. It reminds us that behind every polished exterior is a human story: full of setbacks, resilience, and the courage to begin again.
The Real Failure? Staying Silent
Debt isn’t a moral issue. It isn’t a measure of character. It’s a circumstance: sometimes born from a medical emergency, a job loss, a pandemic, or simply not knowing better at the time. The real danger isn’t owing money; it’s carrying the weight of that struggle in silence.
For those who feel stuck, overwhelmed, or ashamed, there’s a different path. It doesn’t start with judgment or blame. It starts with a conversation, one honest moment that says: “I need help.”
And for those ready to take that step, Life After Debt is here. Not to lecture. Not to shame. But to listen — and to show that freedom doesn’t begin with being debt-free. It begins with telling the truth.
Disclaimer: The information provided is intended for informational purposes only and should not be construed as financial advice. Readers are encouraged to seek professional guidance tailored to their specific circumstances before making any financial decisions.
Published by Stephanie M.
