By: Jason Gerber
In poetry, there exists a rare kind of work that can speak to both the hidden aspects of human emotion and the boldness of unapologetic self-expression. The poem Fear Of Flying, featured in Sari Fishman’s collection that blends poetry with interesting paintings, does just that.
It reflects the tension between desire and restraint while playing with ideas of intimacy, identity, and the masks we wear. In this article, we explore the poem’s core themes, shedding light on its meaning and reflecting on the emotional landscape the author has created.
Fear and Desire in Conflict
The opening line, “remain distant,” sets the tone for the entire poem. It immediately presents a push-pull dynamic, suggesting a desire to connect while simultaneously keeping emotional and physical distance. This theme of keeping someone at arm’s length continues with the striking phrase, “a zipless fuck.”
The reference is borrowed from Erica Jong’s famous novel Fear of Flying, which explores themes of sexual freedom, fear of intimacy, and the struggles of self-liberation. In the context of this poem, the phrase implies a yearning for passion without the vulnerability that comes with true intimacy, a fantasy of connection without consequences.
The desire to engage physically without emotional entanglement is clear, but beneath that is an admission of fear. The speaker confesses, “I will not know you,” and “project my lust upon you,” indicating a deliberate choice to avoid truly seeing or understanding the other person. There’s a self-imposed distance, where lust becomes a safe, one-dimensional projection, an attempt to control the unpredictable chaos of desire by keeping it at bay.
Cowardice of Restraint
The central theme revolves around this tension between desire and fear. The speaker acknowledges, “I am a coward,” laying bare the vulnerability of someone who is afraid to fully engage in intimacy. This admission of cowardice reveals a deeper fear of losing control, of allowing the intensity of human connection to understand their carefully constructed sense of self.
Moreover, the speaker describes themselves as “conservative” and mentions the “remnants of self-respect.” These words suggest a struggle between the desire to let go and the need to preserve dignity. The speaker is aware of the limitations they impose on themselves, trying to maintain control over their image and emotions while knowing that this restraint is, in a way, an act of cowardice.
There is a powerful undercurrent of self-judgment here. The use of “remnants of self-respect” hints at a person who is holding onto old values or inhibitions, perhaps out of fear that losing these last vestiges of control might lead to something they can’t handle, an emotional freefall they’re not ready for.
Dream of Liberation
The poem’s final lines, “one day you will be / my Erica Jong,” offer a tantalizing glimpse into the speaker’s longing for something more, an eventual release from their fears and limitations. Erica Jong, who famously wrote about sexual liberation and the breaking of societal taboos in Fear of Flying, becomes a symbol of the freedom the speaker both desires and dreads. They project this identity onto the other person, suggesting that one day, this person may become their muse, their gateway to a liberated self.
The reference to Jong is layered with meaning. On the one hand, it speaks to the fantasy of liberation, the desire to live without fear, without shame, to be free in one’s desires. On the other hand, it acknowledges that such liberation is not easily attained. The speaker is still distant, still projecting, still caught between the yearning for connection and the fear of it. Jong represents the ideal of freedom, but the speaker remains trapped in their conservatism, unable or unwilling to fully embrace that ideal.
Poetry and Paintings Combined
What makes Fear Of Flying so impactful is the way it captures the complexity of human desire, how we often want what we fear and how the things we desire most are sometimes the very things that keep us at a distance.
The author’s talent for weaving intricate emotions into simple yet powerful words is only enhanced by the visual art that accompanies the poems. The paintings are a visual counterpart to the poetry, offering readers a multi-sensory experience that deepens their understanding of the emotional themes.
In this collection, the combination of poetry and painting invites readers to engage with the work on multiple levels, reflecting not only on the words but also on the emotions the visual art evokes. This pairing of mediums adds richness to the experience, allowing the poems to resonate even more deeply.
Conclusion
Fear Of Flying is more than just a poem about desire or cowardice. It’s an exploration of the delicate dance between intimacy and distance, freedom and restraint. The speaker’s admission of fear, coupled with their longing for liberation, creates a powerful emotional conflict that will resonate with readers who have ever felt trapped by their inhibitions.
The author’s ability to blend powerful imagery with raw vulnerability, along with the complementary paintings, offers an amazing artistic experience. It’s a collection that reflects on the internal struggles of its characters and invites readers to confront their fears, desires, and the boundaries they place between themselves and others.
Published by Rain S.
